Category Archives: December ’16

Climbing at Pilot Mountain

There we were, scrubbing horse crap off my dog, chronicling another installment of the misadventures of Snotty Booger and The Grace Face. Scott held Rosie’s ass in the air as I scrubbed the horse shit off the back of her neck. After a long day of climbing at Pilot Mountain State Park from nearly dawn till dusk, there we were in the park bathroom bathing my dog and she was not happy about it. She tried to wrestle her way out of it, sliding her soap covered paws around the bottom of the small sink with her ass unflatteringly held in the air by Scott. Speckles of horse poo trickled down into the sink and the odor of feces became replaced by the aroma of the cheap hand soap that I scrubbed into her fur. I wasn’t about to put this poopy face mutt back into my backseat for the drive home and was feeling sympathetic toward Scott for having to ride back there with her. In lieu of a knob, the sink had one of those horrible satanic plungers that you have to depress every three seconds to keep the water running. And I honestly struggled to understand how water so cold could remain in liquid form. But hey, guess what you little turd neck, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I freed her when the soap and poop particles were all gone and she bolted around the bathroom like a maniac, dodging the vicious beastly hand dryer on the wall and shaking as she stormed around. Continue reading Climbing at Pilot Mountain

Assumption of Risk

My granddad just turned 83 a few days ago. And as a former cop, he didn’t get there by being a dummy. He has always taken care of himself, paid attention to risks around him, avoided alcohol, and kept himself busy. I’ll never forget seeing him clearing downed trees in his driveway despite being in his 70s. But one thing that has always stood out to me was how he refused to fly on planes. He had helped clean up a plane crash with the bodies of 74 corpses of young soldiers just outside of Richmond in 1961. But despite improvements on air travel and being told about the safety of flying, he decided he would never accept the risk of it, and there was no changing his mind. Continue reading Assumption of Risk

3/8 MD

Last year at this time I was out in Colorado living out of my car climbing 14,000ft peaks. I was single, voluntarily homeless, and smelly. I had left school for a 10 month leave of absence just a couple months earlier and was taking advantage of that time to spend some introspective time out in the backcountry. But this year things have been going a lot differently and I couldn’t be more thrilled about it. Continue reading 3/8 MD

Backpacker gift guide 2016

Family and friends of adventurers, we understand shopping for us for the holidays is difficult. We get it that our alternative lifestyle of living out of cars and rucksacks makes us seem foreign to normal people. We don’t wear jewelry or fancy clothes; our gear is honed for very specific purposes; and what you know about us is based on hair-raising stories and Facebook pictures. So I want to help you on what to shop for that special family member who shows up with a ratty beard and uncombed hair for the holidays. I put together a gift list that may help guide your shopping. Continue reading Backpacker gift guide 2016

How to prevent another Trump presidency

Trump’s electoral college win this month and the failure of logic and reason to prevent a Trump presidency will probably go down in history as nearly analyzed as much as Hitler’s rise to power. In only two weeks I’ve read proposed hundreds of reasons for his success, from lying news to liberal arrogance. And it’s taken me a while to compose myself enough to analyze it and get past the pure vitriol and disgust I have for anyone who voted for that man. But while we cling to simple answers and quick solutions, and of course if we changed any one element of the campaigns and election, the outcome could have and should have been drastically different. I’m not sure though that my thoughts on the matter constitute a simple answer, because the question I’m asking myself is not how he won, but rather how he got any votes at all. And the answer to that question, the source of Donald Trump’s rise to power stems not from liberal media bias or Hillary’s slip ups, but rather from the ignorance, lack of education, and inability to think critically that plagues humanity. And the only way to prevent another Trump presidency is to combat all those things. Continue reading How to prevent another Trump presidency